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It’s Friday afternoon, you’re coming home from work.
While cruising through town you notice someone suddenly begins to identify as clincally retarded, disregarding all rules of the road.
Because you’re a perfect driver, you need to teach this person a lesson by screaming, cursing, giving the finger, speeding up, and braking.
And because the other driver sees you being manic, they react in a similar fashion, though their attempts seem futile and idiotic.
To establish superiority, a back and forth battle will continue until one of you parts ways.
But who won?
How do we crown the winner in road rage?
Unfortunately, unless someone gets shot, we can’t.
Well, that was before Joe “Blow” Rogan created a revolutionary approach.
While constantly being harassed in LA traffic involving the mockery of his booster seat, Joe quickly learned that he was not making headway with the traditional road rage tactics.
After many innovative attempts, he discovered a brilliant technique:
THE BLOW ROGAN
According to Joe, immediately after escalation, lock eyes with your enemy, slowly reach your hand above your face and open your mouth as wide as possible.
Without breaking eye contact, act as if you are pulling an oversized phallus from the air into your mouth and begin performing rapid, intimate fellacio on the invisible penis.
Rogan claims that this not only disrupts the feud, but also leaves the other driver distraught for quite some time.
“When someone sees a person deep throating a make-believe cock while driving, they won’t want anything to do with them.”
He continues, “They’ll think that person has lost their mind and drive off in disgust and surrender.”
“Not only have you won the battle, you’ve won the war.”
CONCLUSION
Instead of using out-dated rage responses, try out the Blow Rogan next time you need to teach someone a lesson about driving.
As a final piece of advice, Rogan states that “This tactic works best on people in homophobic, lesbian, christian, and elderly communities.”
